“Dementia Sucks: A Caregiver’s Journey – With Lessons Learned” is now on sale.

You can buy it on Amazon:

And Barnes and Noble:

Or just saunter into your favorite independent bookstore and ask for a copy. Really. That will help more than just about anything else you can do. Why? Because then they will have to buy it in order to sell it to you. And they’ll probably buy more than one. And then they’ll display “Dementia Sucks” where browsers can see it. And browsers will see the book and want one for their own. And they really need to know what’s in this book.

So thank you for visiting, thank you for caring and if there’s anything you want to know about dementia, feel free to ask. If I don’t know the answer, I’ll point you to someone who does. That’s the way I roll.

About traceysl

Author of the groundbreaking book "Dementia Sucks", Post Hill Press, May, 2018. Having cared for my father, who had vascular dementia and died in 2004, and my mother, who died on April 14, 2015 after a long fight with Alzheimer's disease, I have refocused professionally to helping others through my experience. My company, Grand Family Planning, provides Coaching and Support Services. I am a professional speaker, offering programs for businesses seeking solutions to recruit and retain employees who care for loved ones. In this way, I share my knowledge and give meaning to the tragic turn of my parents' journey through the misery of dementia.
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2 Responses to It’s ALIVE!

  1. Laura Miceli says:

    Hello Tracey,
    My name is Laura, and I live in Portland Oregon. I just recently found your blog, and I’m very glad that I did. I have also ordered your book. I was wondering if I could ask you a question? My mother is 88 and my siblings and I are pretty certain she has dementia. She has been in perfect health most of her life so she refuses to see a doctor. For the last two years, she repeats things to us several times in a day, she has become paranoid about many things, she often forgets to eat, and now she thinks people are trying to scare her by banging on her door at night. We have put up cameras, and there is never anyone there. We are trying to explain that she is just imaganing this, but she gets very angry and defensive that we don’t believe her. How can a woman who has never gotten angry with us in our lives, who has always been well read and informed about the world and everything else, be doing these things? We try to explain it as logically as we can, but it’s just not working. It seems to be getting worse. She remembers all kinds of things correctly from many years ago, but can’t remember 10 minutes ago. Do you have any suggestions of what we should say to her?
    Thank you for reading my comment.

    • traceysl says:

      Hi Laura. Greetings from northern NJ. I am so sorry to hear about your mother. Please note that I am not a doctor and any advice I provide is based on my own experience. That being said, based on what you’re telling me, it sounds like your mother does have dementia. Understand that nothing you say to her is going to change that or make her better. What she needs now is CARE. What you and your siblings need to know and do now could fill a book or two (mine is a good start, but get a copy of “The 36 Hour Day” Find an elder law attorney to make sure you can advocate for mom. She can no longer make decisions for herself and one or more of you will have to step up. Find a good geriatric doctor (Medicare covers doctors). Lie to her if you have to, but get her there. She’ll forget the lie and, remember, you are doing it for her own good. Understand that your mother’s brain is undergoing changes that make it impossible for her to learn anything new. She is probably hallucinating and what she sees in her mind is much more real and compelling than anything you say to her. Don’t try to correct her. Listen to her. Agree with her. Ask more; tell less. Redirect her to focus on pleasant memories she does retain from the past. Let her know that you love her and you’re on her side. If she’s in otherwise good health, she may live a long time with this, so get your resources and support together. (Here’s a link to my 2018 Resource List: You’re going to need all the help you can find. Dementia truly does suck. I wish you all the best with your journey and I hope this helps.

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